Understanding Love Languages: 5 Ways to Express and Receive Love

Discover the five love languages and learn how to express and receive love effectively. Explore tips for identifying and communicating your love language to enhance your relationships.

There probably have been times when you’ve wondered how to understand your partner better and improve your relationship with them. Understanding love languages is not just a possibility but a powerful tool that can significantly enhance your relationship. Imagine if you had the key to your significant other’s heart; every time you use it, it works! Let’s first define the meaning of love language. 

What are Love Languages?

Like every fingerprint is unique, every individual is exceptional, and how they express love is unique. Love language is how you or your partner speaks and prefers to receive love. Your love language is most likely culturally ingrained and results from factors like age, gender, family background, etc. The good news is that identifying your love language is a straightforward process, and with a bit of introspection, you can easily recognise yours and your partner’s. Below, we’ve broken down these love language types to make things easier. 

Understanding the 5 Love Languages

Gary Chapman wrote a book about love language types in 1992, after which the concept of love languages gained popularity. In this book, he explains the love languages as follows: 

1. Words of Affirmation

This love language involves expressing feelings like love and appreciation for your partner. Complimenting your partner or even just saying the words ‘I Love You’ or ‘I Miss You’ make them happy. This is possibly one of the easiest love languages. 

2. Acts of Service

If actions speak louder than words for your partner, this is their love language. It could be as simple as cooking thoughtful dinners or setting alarms to remind them to take their medicines. 

3. Receiving Gifts

More than the actual gift itself, the effort behind getting it makes them feel loved. Receiving gifts is their love language if they lighten up whenever you treat them to something special.

4. Quality Time

This love language revolves around giving your partner undivided attention and uninterrupted time together. 

5. Physical Touch

Your partner probably feels most loved when you hug them or hold hands with them if this is their love language. It’s all about the physical touch for them.

Here’s an audio with Kanchan Wadi on SoulSensei to help you understand the essential qualities of a healthy relationship. 

Identifying Your Love Language

Discovering your love language can immensely improve the quality of all your relationships. Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you identify it. 

Step 1

Take a step back and reflect on all your relationships. Note what makes you feel loved in these relationships. Notice the patterns in your relationships. This will give you a deeper insight into recognising your love languages. 

Step 2

Observe your partner’s actions and reactions. Do they often express their love through acts of service, or do they prefer spending quality time with you? These observations can help you identify whether their love languages are yours. 

Step 3

Get feedback from your loved ones to confirm your love language. Sometimes, an extra set of eyes helps you see things more clearly.

Once you have made notes from all the three steps above, you will likely have found your primary love language. However, it’s also possible to have a secondary love language, which is the second most preferred way you like to receive love. 

Practical Tips for Using Love Languages in Daily Life

If your partner’s love language is words of affirmation, use sentences like ‘I’m proud of you’, ‘You mean the world to me’, and ‘You’re special the way you are’ and more often as possible. If this is your love language, using positive affirmations as part of your daily meditation routine will make a lot of difference. Start your day with this morning affirmation meditation with Simran Pawa. 

If acts of service are your partner’s love language, try doing small things for them daily, like treating them to breakfast in bed or taking over their daily chores when they’re overwhelmed.

If receiving gifts is your partner’s love language, surprise them with sweet love letters or thoughtful gifts. If this is your love language, try treating yourself occasionally with indulgent gifts or experiences. Additionally, practising gratitude for all the gifts you receive from your loved ones can be helpful. 

If your partner loves quality time, try walking together or setting up date nights occasionally. Make sure these activities are phone-free and without any distractions. 

If physical touch is your partner’s love language, find ways to get intimate with them daily. It could involve doing something as simple as patting them on the back or cuddling on the couch while watching your favourite movie. 

For overall relationship improvement, try using this guided meditation by Shreans Daga to heal your relationships. 

Love languages are the way you like to express and receive love. There are five love languages. Understanding them can help improve relationships and help you connect better with those around you. Learn more about elevating relationships with guided practices and wisdom lectures from experts on SoulSensei.

Sources

• What are the five love languages? By Sherri Gordon.
• There are five love languages – Here’s How to Find Yours by Adrienne Santos-Longhurst.
• The five love languages – And how to use them to strengthen your relationship. By Heidi Borst.

Frequently Asked Questions