In a world constantly bombarded with negative information and shocking news, it is not uncommon to experience trust issues and insecurities in interpersonal relationships. As more and more marriages break every day, relationship insecurities are at an all-time high. Not being able to trust your partner or not being trusted by your partner can be equally overwhelming and stressful. Relationship insecurities can manifest in the form of jealousy, overprotectiveness, and possessiveness. Some trust issues in relationships can be easier to overcome than others. The first step to building trust in relationships is to understand where the insecurities are coming from.
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Understanding the Root Causes of Trust Issues and Insecurities
Relationship insecurities can be a result of many different experiences in life. When learning how to fix trust issues, it helps when you understand why you have them to begin with. Here are some common causes of trust issues in relationships.
1. Childhood Trauma
Certain negative or traumatic experiences during your childhood can lead you to become an insecure individual. If you were abused or mistreated as a child, you will have trouble trusting people in your life as an adult.
2. Social Rejection
If you faced social isolation in the form of bullying or ostracisation in the past, you are more likely to use trust issues as a defence mechanism to avoid hurting yourself again. People who experience social rejection can suffer from lower self-esteem which can result in trust issues.
3. Post-traumatic Stress Disorder
If you’ve been through a serious traumatic life event such as sexual assault, serious illness, major accident or physical abuse, trust issues are one of how this disorder manifests. You might hesitate to trust the people around you because you’ve been hurt before, and this is your body’s way of keeping you safe.
4. Mental Health Factors
Conditions like anxiety, depression, paranoia or schizophrenia can also lead to trust issues with those closest to you.
Learn how one person can change a relationship in this short session with Kanchan Wadi or read more on Positive Affirmations for Love Relationships
Overcoming Relationship Insecurities
While it is easier said than done, there are a few things you can do to fix relationship insecurities. Here are a few ways you can start healing and building a better, stronger bond with your partner.
1. Focus on Personal Growth
The first step to fixing the relationships with those around you is to fix your relationship with yourself. Self-awareness and personal growth are highly effective in healing, no matter which area of your life you’re trying to fix. Only by knowing why you behave the way you do can you work on the root cause and steer the trajectory of your life for the better. Some ways you can focus on yourself are to build a daily meditation practice, exercise regularly and eat healthy.
Explore this guided meditation to heal relationships with Shreans Daga.
2. Improve Communication
The most important answer to the question of how to build a strong bond with your partner is to work on your communication skills. Communication is key to improving any relationship. Learning your partner’s boundaries, respecting them, taking feedback from them, being empathetic and learning how to resolve any conflict effectively are some skills that are important to fix relationship insecurities.
Learn how to overcome conflicts effectively in this short session with Nityanand Charan Das.
3. Practice Patience
Once you understand your behaviour and your patterns, give yourself time to sit with your feelings. Process them at your own pace without judgement, and be patient about the healing process. Most trust issues are deep-rooted and take time to resolve, so don’t be too hard on yourself or rush things. Give yourself and your partner enough time to heal and move forward.
4. See a Therapist
If, after everything, you see no progress, it’s best to see a professional, as they can help you make strides towards fixing your relationship insecurities. Knowing when you need external help is key. A good, qualified therapist can truly change your life around by diagnosing the root cause and offering you the right tools to achieve your goals.
The Role of Communication in Building Trust
Good communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship. Being able to understand not only verbal communication but non-verbal cues like body language and tone of voice play a significant role in determining the quality of your relationships. When you’re trying to build trust in any relationship, it’s important to practice active listening, be fully present, practice non-judgement, avoid the blame game and communicate your needs clearly.
Unlock the secret to long-lasting relationships in this short session with Dr.Shubha Vilas.
Most people experience relationship insecurities in their lives. These arise from negative childhood experiences, social rejection and certain mental health issues. The good news is that these relationship insecurities can be worked on. The most important tool to fix any trust issues in relationships is communication and working on personal growth. Despite your best efforts, if everything else fails, it’s ideal to see a professional. Learn more about working on personal growth from experts on SoulSensei.
Sources
- Talkspace – How to fix trust issues in relationships. By Minkyung Chung.
- Talkspace – Overcoming insecurity in relationships. By Minkyung Chung.
- Skillsoft – Trust building through effective communication.
